And for that matter, is the bouquet toss now a tired tradition?
Here’s a fact: Brides are still carrying bouquets and wearing bridal garters, but more of those brides are holding onto their bouquets and keeping their bridal garters private. Personally, I spent so much time making my own bouquet – and a very good friend spent about five times as much time sewing my bridal garter – that I wasn’t about to toss either of them. That’s not the only reason that brides are electing not to include the bouquet toss and garter toss in their roster of wedding reception events, of course. Some brides and grooms are not comfortable with the subtext underlying the bouquet and bridal garter tosses, which implies that getting married is expected and necessary. Others don’t want to force single friends and relatives to out themselves. And still others just don’t want to be the center of attention in that way.
Who hasn’t attended at least one wedding were the groom removed the bridal garter with his teeth?
Of course, some brides and grooms love the bouquet toss and the garter toss, and we’re not going to criticize! It is harmless, when it comes right down to it, and for some people, it’s a lot of fun. However, we were curious to hear more about why brides-to-be are opting out so we scoured the web to find some answers. Here are some reasons brides are opting out of the garter toss:
“I don’t honestly know info behind the tradition of the garter, but there is no way in heck I’m going to let someone search up my skirt and remove something to toss into an audience of all of my family and friends, no matter how much I love him. Every time I see this at a wedding it seems so tacky, I cringe.”
“I hate the symbolism behind the garter toss! It started out as a way to prove to the bride’s family that the bride and groom were, er, consummating.”
“I am not doing a bouquet or garter toss. All of our friends are mostly married. We thought it would be better to skip this tradition then call out and embassy the small handful of single guests.”
“I’m not doing the garter because I dont really want my FH going up my dress in front of my parents…but we are keeeping the bouquet toss.”
“In the 1950’s when it first became common, the bride simply handed it to the groom when she returned to the reception hall after changing into her “going-away” dress. It wasn’t until the “liberated” seventies that people became jaded enough that they needed a little obscenity to add spice to a wedding. And you are quite right, that those little added “features” of the bump-and-grind; strip-hall music, and public exhibitionism are offensive in the extreme.”
“I am so not doing a bridal garter or bouquet toss. I think they are ridiculous, humiliating traditions. I am going to wear a garter, though. Just because I want to.”
Will your new spouse be tossing the bridal garter at the reception?