The mere mention of the word marriage makes you imagine a couple standing at church door exchanging their wedding vows. But are these vows really life long or no, one really doesn’t know. The vow which they exchange is “till death do us part” but it is only after a short period of marriage that their vow show its true colors
Marriage, the most important of earthly relationships can be enjoyed by adventurous people who have the capacity to explore and express their inventions. Marriage is about forming a relationship in which independence is equal, dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal. To be more straightforward it’s easy to get the ticket for marriage but it’s difficult to maintain the vows involved in it. The vows are read only by the celebrant and repeated by the bride and groom. The couple didn’t take the time before the wedding to carefully consider the implications of these vows and whether or not they could keep them until death. Just have a look at a traditional vow:
______, as we stand before both God and man, making public our commitment to one another, I wish to make it known that I recognize first of all God’s authority over my life which is exercised from His loving heart. He has chosen me to be one of his own, and He is now my life. I recognize also that He has blessed me and entrusted to me your life as a free gift that I have not earned. In recognition of these things, ____ I purpose to love you with His love, to provide for your needs through His enablement, and to lead you as He leads me, as long as He give us life together, regardless of the circumstances. As Psalm 34:3 expressed my heart when I asked you to marry me, so it expresses my heart now: “O magnify the Lord with me and let us exalt His name together.”
On this special day, _____, I am reminded of the verse James l:17 which says, “Every good thing bestowed and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of Lights with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow.” With a gift such as you, I know that many new responsibilities face me. In I Corinthians, it explains “It is required of a steward to be found trustworthy.” I cannot do this on my own strength, _______, but by God’s grace and power working within me I desire to be trustworthy as your wife by following your leading submissively, even as unto Christ, loving and serving you in all circumstances as long as He give me life on this earth.
After the wedding ceremony, the festive atmosphere fades away; the food is eaten and guests go home. What is left behind is the wedding vows which have tied the couple together. So, that means they are together till the wedding vows are not broken.
Just keep in mind, what you speak to your fiance on the day of your wedding will be a stepping stone towards the journey of your life. Apart from repeating the set traditional wedding vow, now days what is in is creating your own wedding vow. It is worth noticing that you waste your precious time on material things such as deciding menu etc. and give a backseat to your expression of feelings which could provide a lively touch to your relationship.
Your personalized wedding vow would surely prove worthy of your one true love. This would serve as a medium to show that the personalities of the couples are fully incorporated into their wedding day. Adding your personal feelings to the legal proceedings, you can give an intimacy to your ceremony.
What couples ordinarily feel is that their personalized vows can be more meaningful than traditional vows. Some couples regard traditional vows as chauvinistic. Since they want to lay down the foundation of equality to flower their relationship, it becomes natural for them to become anti-traditional. It is a great idea which includes your thanks to lord, your gratitude to your family and friends, your hopes and dreams and your feelings for each other. It may include your views on commitment and trust. For the couples who believe in personalizing their vows, their vows now don’t have any space for the word “obey” as it is replaced by the word “promise””I promise to love you, comfort and encourage you, to be open and honest with you, and stay with you as long as we both shall live”
Following is an example of a personally written vow:
……., today we make a commitment to one another. I want you to know that you are a precious gift and that you bring so much joy into my life. I affirm the special bond between us, and promise to keep it alive always. I promise to be your confidante, your best friend and to share in your hopes and dreams. In recognition of this, I… take you… to be my husband. With this vow we face new responsibilities together. I will be trustworthy as your wife, and to love you in all circumstances.
Most couples still choose to follow a standard order of service, to exchange wedding vows:
*The Declaration of intentions
*The Exchange of rings
Take the time to talk with your Officiant and discuss the options you have. This will give you time to plan ahead, write your vows and to become comfortable in reciting them.